


Through Eternity (Not Sorry For Love)

by killingmonsterswritingthings



Category: Football RPF
Genre: Angst, Established Relationship, Fluff, Goodbyes, Hurt/Comfort, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-05-31
Updated: 2015-05-31
Packaged: 2018-04-02 04:32:29
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,142
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4046074
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/killingmonsterswritingthings/pseuds/killingmonsterswritingthings
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Marco doesn't stomach the loss of the DFB Cup final as well as he would like. Mario calling to wish him a Happy Birthday is a welcome distraction.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Through Eternity (Not Sorry For Love)

**Author's Note:**

> I started this last night after my brain was like "haha it's Marco's birthday now so what if Götzeus" and now I'm very tired and emotionally exhausted.
> 
> This is purely self-indulgent because I somehow needed to write this and it's probably extremely ooc. I still dedicate this to [chemicalcentury](http://chemicalcentury.tumblr.com) because you said Marco/Mario and my brain latched onto that.
> 
> Disclaimer: I don't own the people in this fanfic, that would be weird. I am in no way affiliated with them, either. This is a work of fiction, written for my own (and hopefully your) "amusement" and is in no way meant to offend or gain any kind of monetary profit.
> 
> I read over it again but there might be mistakes (especially in the name department because my ADHD makes me fuck up sometimes) so let me know if you see anything...

Mario calls him a few minutes after midnight. Marco is at the party but his heart's not in it, he's too frustrated and wound up so the phone in his hand is a welcome excuse to escape his teammates who want to celebrate his birthday with him.

"Happy birthday," Mario says instead of a greeting and Marco's answering laugh is bitter.

"Yeah, thanks," he says, sarcasm dripping off his voice.

There's a beat of silence, only noticeable because Marco knows the small, off-sounding hitch that Mario's breathing makes when he's hesitating.

"I'm sorry," Mario says and it sounds so genuine and sad that for a moment Marco forgets they didn't both lose tonight. But he catches himself and his hand grips the phone tighter.

"Why?" he asks. "It's not your fault I can't fucking score anymore, is it?"

Mario sighs on the other end of the line. "You know that's not true."

"Yeah yeah I tried really hard. Probably too hard," Marco mumbles because that's what they told him, accompanied with well-meaning pats on the back and one-armed hugs. He pushes open the door to the small courtyard and steps into the cool city air. Tears sting in his eyes and he tries to blink them away but to no avail. He rubs at his wet cheeks angrily with his free hand and a small sob he can't stifle escapes his lips.

"Marco...," Mario says helplessly and his voice in Marco's ear just makes it worse.

This wasn’t even the worst thing that happened this season but for some reason it hurts just as much as getting injured or getting booed by their own fans.

"I miss you," he chokes out and he can't even hate himself for the admission. He just misses him so much and a small part of him can't help but think the dreaded _maybe if he'd stayed today would have gone different_. But it's been long enough that he just ignores it because he has to.

"I miss you too," Mario says and then adds, "I wish I could hug you."

"I wish you were here," Marco says becayse to hell with it, it's the truth. He's through with lying. He's hurting enough already anyway.

He hears Mario's little gasp through the phone. "Should I come to Berlin?" he asks and Marco clutches at his chest. He _loves_ him. It just hits him again how much he loves him.

He shakes his head with his eyes firmly pressed shut until he remembers that Mario can't see him. "No," he mumbles, "we're flying home tomorrow anyway and I..." He bites his lips but then asks anyway. "Could you come there? Home?"

"Of course." There's no hesitation at all and Marco is so glad. "I'd come to the airport, but..." Mario adds and then trails off and Marco almost has to smile.

"Yeah, probably not a good idea," he says. "Just... be there when I get home?"

"I'll be there," Mario promises.

"Thank you," Marco says and oh god does he mean it.

The door next to him flies open. "Here you are!" Auba declares triumphantly.

"Don't be a douchebag. He’s on the phone," comes Kehli's voice from behind him and he shoves Auba back into the corridor, closes the door behind him but stays outside himself.

"'S that the captain?" Mario asks and Mario has to laugh, even though it sounds shaky.

"Not anymore," he says and yeah, that's another thing.

"Always, Marco! Have you learned nothing?" Mario scolds him. Mostly, Marco learned that nothing's forever. But he doesn't say that.

"Do you wanna talk to him?" he asks instead.

"No," Mario says and there's something in his voice that is dangerously close to nostalgia, "it's okay. Give him a hug from me, yeah?"

"Yeah, okay," he says. "I gotta go now I think." He hesitates for a second, his eyes flickering to Sebastian. But he knows anyway and Marco has been beyond caring for a long time. "See you tomorrow. I love you."

"I love you too. See you soon," Mario says and he sounds so incredibly fond that Marco has to smile a little when he ends the call but it disappears again when he crosses eyes with Sebastian.

He sighs and steps closer, wrapping his arms around the older man, his phone still clutched in his hand. "This is from Mario," he explains. "And from me too." Sebastian hugs him back and rubs his back a little.

"I hate change," Marco finally mumbles.

Sebastian chuckles a little. "You're only 26 now, wait a little until you stop celebrating your birthdays."

And Marco is sure Sebastian knows that that's not what he meant. But his words matter anyway. He holds him a little tighter for a moment, then slowly lets go.

"Is he coming to Dortmund?" Sebastian asks and Marco nods. “That’s good. You deserve that.”

Marco raises an eyebrow. “Do I really?”

“You didn’t do worse than any of us,” Sebastian says firmly. “We were good, we just weren’t good enough. But it’s done now and the season’s over so there’s no use to beat yourself up over it. You get to try again next year.”

“There’s always next year,” Marco sighs and shoves his hands into his pockets. “But it’ll be _different_.”

Sebastian groans and raises his hand, ruffles his hair. Marco squeaks but doesn’t move away, limits himself to looking at him with the best angry look he can muster. “Every season is different, you little brat. Don’t think we won’t cheer you on. And if you don’t win next year I’m gonna beat your ass.” He squints. “Or possibly someone else’s ass.”

“You do that,” Marco says, but he doesn’t feel as horrible for a moment anymore.

“Deal,” Sebastian grins. “And now lets go back inside, you already missed Auba and Neven pouring water over Mats head because he ‘had no chill’.” He exaggerates the airquotes with an eyeroll and Marco snorts.

“How angry is he?” he asks and steps back to the door, opening it.

“Well after he was able to change he’s cooled down significantly,” Sebastian says, following him through the door and letting it fall shut behind them again.

“Sorry for being a bummer during your party,” Marco says.

Sebastian shrugs. “It’s not really my party,” he says, “and it’s fine, really. I get it.”

So Marco goes inside and apologises to Auba for just vanishing and Sebastian apologises to him for slamming the door in his face and Auba shrugs it off and laughs and hands Marco a beer.

He’s still angry, angry that they couldn’t give Sebastian and Jürgen the send-off they deserved. It’s duller now than it was at the beginning of the night but it’s still there and Marco knows it’s evident on his face but he can’t do anything against it. But he lets Kevin sling his arm around his shoulder and takes a sip of his beer and tries to turn off his head.

And it sort of works until everyone starts singing for Sebastian and then everyone sings for Jürgen. Marco smiles and sings along and drinks his third beer. But then they start singing happy birthday for him – again – and he has to grip the bottle a little tighter.

Somehow he manages, though, and he gets through it – even if he cries a bit again during Jürgen’s last speech – and in the end he even finds himself smiling a little despite the ache but he’s still glad when he can leave and go to sleep.

  


On the plane back home he puts his headphones on and closes his eyes, drowning everyone else out on the pretense of a hangover that he doesn’t have. He’s glad for Kevin and Auba next to him. They leave him alone and just talk between themselves because they can read him well enough, but their presence is somehow reassuring.

He actually falls asleep again even though the flight is short and is startled awake when Kevin gently pushes at his shoulder and pulls one side of his headphones away from his ear. “We’re landing,” he says and Marco nods.

There’s a few fans at the airport still, despite the loss and it makes Marco remember again that there will be no Borsigplatz celebration. That they let them down.

Sebastian pats his shoulder on the way to sign a few autographs and it helps but Marco’s chest is still tight and he just wants to go _home_.

Still, he makes sure to hug Sebastian and Jürgen again after they get off the bus. There’s nothing much left to say, except some firm “This isn’t goodbye forever”s and then he finally heads off with Kevin because he still needs someone to drive him around.

Kevin lets him out in front of his driveway. “Are you coming out again later?” he asks and Marco shrugs.

“Not sure if we will,” he says honestly, “but Mario’s gonna try to convince me so I’m gonna let you know.”

“Alright,” Kevin grins and Marco shuts the car door, raises his hand in goodbye and then turns around to head to his house.

Before he can even start to look for his keys the door opens and Mario is running towards him. Marco stops short because he didn’t expect him to be here already, thought he was only coming in later, hadn’t checked his phone since the morning.

Then he lets go of his bag just in time for Mario to throw his arms around him and hug him tightly.

“Happy birthday,” Mario says again, kissing his cheek, and this time Marco can smile.

“Thank you,” he mumbles into his neck and his heart is beating so hard that he’s sure Mario has to be able to feel it.

Mario’s hold on him just tightens even more and one of his hands is buried in Marco’s hair. They’re standing in the middle of his driveway and Marco doesn’t care one bit.

“I’m glad you’re here,” Marco says and Mario’s laughter vibrates against him.

“Of course,” he says.

“Best present ever,” Marco says. He doesn’t need anything else really. Not when Mario’s here.

“You said the same thing last year.”

“I did.” Marco pinches Mario’s side, causing him to slap his hand and twist away. “Because I love you.”

Mario’s expression softens and he picks up Marco’s bag from the ground. “Come on,” he says, “I got food and movies.”

“Good,” Marco sighs, following him into the house. There’s not much more he wants to do today.

You’d think he would be better at coping with change by now, he thinks as he sits on his couch curled up against Mario. He knows it’s inevitable and not always bad. But he still hates it.

“How are you?” Mario asks, running a hand lazily up and down his sides.

“Okay, I guess,” Marco says.

“You know they’re not leaving forever, right?” Mario says, stretching out his legs a little and Marco sighs. Of course he’d look right through him.

“Yeah, I know.” He isn’t convinced, really. Because people leave all the time.

“You of all people should know best that just people leave doesn’t mean they’re gone forever,” Mario says and bumps their shoulders. “We made it work, right? Don’t tell me you don’t think Jürgen’s gonna watch all of the games and keep visiting you. You guys are basically family to him. _We_ are family to him. And Kehli’s going to stay in some way anyway, too. You don’t lose people just because they decide to do something else.”

Marco makes himself even smaller, hugging Mario tightly. “Yeah,” he mumbles. “I know, okay? But sending them off like this is kind of shitty anyway and it feels bad.”

“They don’t blame you for that,” Mario says. “It’s not your fault, it’s not anyone’s fault. You played well. Sometimes it just doesn’t go your way.”

“Also the ref was a douche,” Marco mumbles and Mario laughs.

“That’s true. See?” Mario brushes over his hair lightly and Marco pushes his head into Mario’s hand. Mario is the only one who’s really allowed to do this. “Not your fault. You definitely should have gotten that penalty and then you would have turned the game around. Totally the ref’s fault.”

“I wish it was that easy,” Marco says.

“It is. It’s all about what you chose to believe and today you can make this your truth for a while.”

Marco thinks about it for a moment. “Okay,” he says then.

Because he’s safe with Mario and he knows he can let go of this. At least for today. Maybe until he has other things to focus on again. In the end he knows he’ll be okay.

And with Mario’s hands going through his hair nothing seems as daunting as it was an hour ago. So Marco believes.

**Author's Note:**

> (shhh Mario totally has a key to Marco's house ;) )


End file.
